Holidays are always busy, full of things to do and for some, no matter how busy they may make you, it is a time that hurts the most. Why? Because holidays are when we make some of our best memories. Christmas comes once a year, but for me, it is the holiday that holds onto memories of my every year.
I can still remember my Christmas’s with my grandmother, her love of Bing Crosby and the carols he sings. I remember how she would buy each of us children marshmallow chocolates, how she had very little money, but always seem to buy the best gifts. They didn’t cost a fortune but, they were filled with love and that was worth more than gold.
I can remember Christmas eve every year at my aunt and uncles with all of my family there.
I can still see my momma decorating every inch of our home and smiling from ear to ear, because she loved it so much. I remember burning my hair on a candle she had lit by our picture window, while I looked out at the falling snow.
Of course, I remember the piles of gifts under the tree on Christmas morning, but most of all I remember the ambiance of Christmas, and the internal warmth I felt as I looked around at the glow surrounding us.
I remember my mom and grandma reminding me what the true meaning of Christmas was and telling me the story of baby Jesus and his birth.
I will always remember the Christmas I spent with my late husband and our children and how wonderful each one of them were. I’ll never forget my husband’s excitement for the kids to wake up and see that Santa had come. He couldn’t wait any longer for them to wake up on their own, so he started banging pots and pans until their little eyes open in frustration over the noise.
I can still see their little faces lighting up when they came into the front room and I can still hear their little voices, most Christmas mornings, running into our room to wake us up in excitement to open their gifts and see what had come. I can still hear my late husband’s beautiful voice singing Christmas hymns.
One of the most impressionable Christmas’s, was the Christmas without my husband there. The emptiness we all felt as we tried to make the most of the holiday together and for the first time, the feeling as if it would never be the same again.
Here is the thing about Christmas, it is a magical time of year, and it always fills my heart with joy and happiness. The memories will always be there, because they are some of the most memorable and special moments in my life. Even though it hurts that he is no longer physically present for them, I know he is always a part of each and every one of them.
The most beautiful thing about Christmas is the coming together with loved ones, family, and friends, and spending that moment loving one another and feeling hopeful, fulfilled, and grateful for every second you have with one another. It is one time throughout the year where everyone is sharing in the ambiance and the glory of a families love.
This year I get to start new traditions with someone new and with his beautiful family as well as my own. We get to create a glorious ambiance all our own and add more wonderful people to our family. Having more to love and share affection, what an amazing gift that is.
The lord has helped me to build an incredible family that surrounds me and has directed me towards amazing friends. He has filled my life with an overabundance of loved ones and built a wall of love around me that makes me forever grateful.
The lord has given me the grace of continuing to make memories at Christmas and all year through and he reminds me that he has not taken anyone away from me, but instead he has provided me with the blessings of giving me so much more. He has added to my family and continues to keep my late husband surrounding my children and myself while we keep going on. What a miraculous gift at Christmas and always.
I wish you all the blessings of the Lord, this Christmas and throughout this New year. May you all have a Merry Christmas full of memories and love, may your memories last a lifetime, and your families continue to grow. May you find all the love you deserve, and may you find your special ambiance that fills you full o of warmth and happiness always.