A Child’s frame of mind

By Kristie Blackwood

The actions or words of just one human being can inspire someone, give someone purpose to think, give someone purpose to act or completely destroy someone. The context within the topic is will they have a positive outlook or a negative reaction? The main characters that have such an impact on our children today are the parents, the teachers, the coaches, and their peers. The main sources that fill their minds are the parents, the teachers, the coaches, their peers, and social media. Because social media can be such a negative force on their impressionable young minds, it is the parents, teachers and coaches that must remain the positive influence that keeps our children growing in the right direction. We should be encouraging spiritual growth, educational growth, mental growth and personal growth. 

As parents we should be responsive to every question and redirecting their minds from the garbage that social media feeds them. We are supposed to be responsible adults and the positive impression our children learn from. Teachers should not be sharing their political views. Our children are not their audience to build up their ego or impress their opinions on. Coaches should not be favoring players based on a parents input during the season or whether they are a local or a transplant player.  They should be praising every player and accolades should be given to a child because they earned them, not because their parents volunteered more or padded the coaches ego. When a child works especially hard for these specific adults and his efforts go unrecognized how do you think that effects their mentality towards those they look up to? What do you think deflating someone’s pride in their hard work does for them?

When a parent is too wrapped up in work or life in general and spends little to no focus on their children, where do you think they look for attention? When they have unlimited time to spend on social media, because we as parents seem to have no time for them, who do you think is influencing them? What are they actually learning from you?

We wonder why there are school shootings, why young people are spewing hateful rhetoric, following political activists and holding onto their words like they are gold. Every child has their moments of acting out, we all have. When there is no one paying attention and to many ignoring them or making them feel resentful and tired of their efforts going unnoticed they turn their focus towards those who portray an interest in them for their own personal agenda. Those who wish to corrupt their minds and sway their beliefs. Children will seek other ways to be seen and heard.  That’s why they throw temper tantrums, that’s why at four years old, when my mom wasn’t listening to me, I turned over and broke a glass coffee table. That’s why they choose to become martyrs for a cause, so they can be seen and recognized even if it’s for something unfathomable. Video games today make killing seem natural, easy and fun. Instead of reading and talking to our children we are handing them cell phones and tablets to play on.

Folks, we adults are the systemic problem with society today. We are supposed to lead by example, but we are not leading at all. We are supposed to encourage, to engage, to inspire, and build up our youth. We are not supposed to steer their impressionable minds towards video games and social media. We are not supposed to use our children to gain accolades for ourselves or act like children ourselves and choose our favorites to get all the attention. We are not supposed to give into our children and accept their bad behavior. We are supposed to teach our children that rewards are earned not handed to you and when you work hard and earn it you will be acknowledged and praised. We are supposed to have family meals so that we can share about our day and focus on our family. We are supposed to educate our children at home as well as at school. We are supposed to pay attention to our children’s behaviors and realize when they are struggling. This is when we must focus on them more than ever. We should be guiding our children to be strong, to be kind, to be respectful, to be faithful, and to be passionate about life, not hateful and resentful.

We made the choice to procreate and be responsible for that life. We need to make time every day for the human beings we have brought into this world. We should be reminding them that they are loved and consistently telling them how proud we are of them. We should be educating them on the negative affects of video games and teaching them right from wrong. There should be constant communication on today’s happenings in the world and what we should be taking from them. We need to think of the impression we are leaving on our children by the behaviors we are exhibiting. We need to put our children’s well-being before our own. Our reactions and feelings must be well thought out before we make choices and act on them. The day we brought them into this world life became about them and not about us anymore.

I am not without my faults as a parent and I hold myself accountable to make sure that my child never feels the effects of a coaches biased decisions, that he never gives time to ponder the ideas of an egotistical teacher or activist, and that he knows that my focus is first and foremost on his needs. I have already raised three strong men, but I made my mistakes along the way. The sound choices I believed I made for them may not have been the best choices and while I don’t regret my decisions, I do resent that I had to make them and that they were affected by them. The one thing I am sure of is that I will never let any other human being influence or affect my child negatively. I will always be there to listen and be his comfort and support in this world even after I leave it.

I know my children well and I know I have made a positive impression on them. I am proud of the men I raised and am stilling raising. I only hope that someday I can be proud of the world they are living in. My children inspire me to be a better person, and I hope that every one of us can say that today. Lets do better for our children, lets leave them in a better world than the one we have been living in. We as parents have the greatest impact on our child’s mentality.  Let’s be the responsible adults we should be and make better choices for the well-being of our young impressionable minds out there.

If we are going to make an impression, let’s make it a positive one. Who will leave the greatest impression on your child?

Lyndon B. Johnson once said, “The only real power available to the leader is the power of persuasion.” Let’s strengthen our children’s minds so that they are never persuaded by the wrong sources.

Norman Vincent Peale’s Power of Positive thinking says, “The way to happiness: Keep your heart free from hate, your mind from worry, live simply, expect little, give much. “Let’s teach our children to be positive warriors not hateful martyrs.

Proverbs 22:6 states, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Let’s be the positive force that raises our children to be God fearing men and women and know that their greatest strength comes through faith.